Hey Carly - here's my shout-out to you!!! It was so great seeing you again this past weekend - I miss your surprise hugs! Make sure to send me your blog site! And thanks so much for making me feel like I actually have a life!!!

So on with my blog... I really debated writing about this because usually when I complain about my problems on this site, I try to keep them vague and not express too many details... But this one will probably turn out different... The bottom line is that I am not sure where I fit in. Everything has changed from last year. Some things have changed for the better! But at times I just feel kind of lost and left out. I still regularly attend my home church since I am in Hamilton every weekend. But it feels different - probably because last year I was so involved in youth and teaching Sunday School and band. This year I didn't want to commit to teaching Sunday school just in case I all of a sudden couldn't come home for the weekend. But just this past weekend I find out that except for me and one other girl, the band has started up again - I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I kind of feel left out...

Another place where I feel left out is with camp people (and I know a bunch of you read this, that's why I feel akward posting about it...). Last summer was one of the best summers of my life! It was wicked sweet and the people there helped me through alot of things that they don't know about and with other things like Becca's death. But then the school year comes and alot of them get together to go out and do fun things together and I find out about them afterwards. This summer I decided that I wanted to do something different so I decided not to apply at camp and now I guess I'm just afraid that this "left out" feeling will just get a whole lot worse.

Lastly, two of my best friends (and girls who were/are like my older sisters) moved to Calgary. Since then it's been really hard for me to deal with the fact that it's not the three of us anymore - it's the two of them and their new best friends... Especially since one of them has completely stopped talking to me since January even though I have tried extremely hard to keep in contact with her any way possibly, and she knows how much I need her right now...

Enough complaining... I hope I don't whine too much on this blog!

Something I thought of today - do not take anything for granted! My church is sponsoring two refugees from Sudan. One has just arrived and came to my house for lunch this afternoon. After we had prayed for the meal, he held up his knife and fork and said (in broken English) "before we start eating, I want to know how do I use these?" I was shocked although I guess I shouldn't have been. It's just amazing to think that things we do so simply are new for others! Keep that in mind while you're typing on the keyboard (example, why are the letters placed the way they are?) or participating in a church service that is so regular to you (example, why exactly do we say the things we do?). I am also just thankful that I didn't have to leave my family behind in a country filled with devistation.